baby it’s cold outside (there is no “baby,” but just go with it)

Here’s a question for the ages: When a major storm is threatening to hit, why do people rush the grocery stores for bread and milk? I understand the bread, but why milk? Wouldn’t it make more sense to get water? If the power goes out and the fridge doesn’t work, your milk won’t stay cold. Water, on the other hand, doesn’t go bad. So why milk?

These are the questions that keep me up at night.

Well, in case the 10,000 tweets and 5,000 weather app screenshots haven’t kept you well-enough informed, the polar vortex is indeed upon us, and those of us in the Southern states are decidedly not pleased.

And this isn't even the worst of it. GO AWAY, POLAR VORTEX.
And this isn’t even the worst of it. GO AWAY, POLAR VORTEX.

I mean, there are reasons I refused to look above the Mason-Dixon for a job after college. These are just not temperatures I am willing to deal with for multiple months.

Going into work yesterday, I was hoping that my normally-quite-warm 3rd floor office would be sufficient to keep me relatively comfy. But alas, the two mildly drafty windows near my desk prevented such comfort, and I spent my day with my coat and scarf on and praying my feet would eventually warm up. #polarvortexproblems

However, I really shouldn’t complain too much. Through those same two windows I could hear the groans of the poor Jan-Term students walking across campus. I’m so very sorry, you guys. #biggerpolarvortexproblems

And then, despite the well-below-freezing temperature and literally howling winds, I made a quick foray downtown to watch (and mock) The Bachelor.

(Yes, I admit it, I’ve given in to the one reality show I once told myself I’d never watch. It’s just so addictive, you guys. I mean, during what other show do you see someone whose occupation is listed as a “Free Spirit?” And no, I’m not kidding.)

But don’t worry, I still capped off the night with the second half of the BCS Championship. And I gotta say, that was an excellent game, featuring one exceptional sweater vest on the part on Gus Malzahn. And now that it’s over and a team from Alabama no longer has control of the trophy, I’m hoping the state as a whole can just take a college football chill pill for a while. Please. That’s all I’m asking for.

Yet, just like my request for snow to make this miserable cold somehow worth it, I have the distinct feeling I won’t be getting what I wish for. Alas.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I will be spending this even colder Tuesday night bundled up in the house while the roommate is at the movies with a boy. But I’ve got tea and a new episode of Downton Abbey, so who’s the real winner here?

…don’t answer that.


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